Tuesday, September 13, 2005

Toothpaste Wars

There are two kinds of people... Squeezers and Rollers.

The Squeezers' technique involves pressing the thumb and forefinger anywhere in the middle of the toothpaste tube, with pressure generally propelling a large glob of paste onto the brush. When the toothpaste gets low, Squeezers then crinkle the tube in an attempt to force out the paste hiding in the odd bumps and ridges. Sometimes, they will even scrunch and wring to the point of strangling the defenseless tube.

Rollers, on the other hand, take more time and care with their pasting. Each day, they neatly roll the back end of the tube and push the paste evenly up towards the spout. Then, when the paste eventually gets low, there is no work involved in extracting the last licks of paste. These people tend to be somewhat anal at times, and a bit obsessive compulsive.

I, myself, am a Roller from way back. My boyfriend, however, is a hard core Squeezer. Thus, we have... The Toothpaste War. A daily power struggle. A battle for control of the Colgate Total.

And the fact is, I'm weakening. I'm beginning to give in. It is just so disheartening when I do all that work to get the paste even across and rolled onto the one side of the tube, and then the next morning I wake to find a big thumb imprint in the middle, and paste pushed out in every direction. Sigh... So recently I have found myself, dare I say, succumbing to The Man.

Should I just throw in the tissue on this one, and give up altogether? Or is this what people are talking about when they say relationships involve compromise? And you... Which side of the war are you on?
posted by Danielle @ 12:06 PM |


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